The food and beer are reliable, nothing exceptional, but solid. (Except, of course, when it's not.) Fish and chips are one of the better options.

CLOSED 9/6/2007
for more information, see this OregonLive Breaking News story

Remember Jellyfish? It's gone, and now Alberta Street Oyster Bar and Grill is in its place. Not that anyone would confuse the two.

I know nada from oysters, so I brought someone who does. She was impressed with the oyster selection, and the fact that you could order a half dozen and get one of each type. She started her meal with the Bloody Mary Oyster Shooter with fresh grated horseradish, which was well received.

ASOBG has a good selection of wines and drinks, and they have beer on tap as well. Out of a halfdozen or so taps, I recall Laurelwood's Motherlode Golden, Alameda's Porter, and Rogue Dead Guy. There is also a bar happy hour menu which I've been assured kicks ass. The atmosphere is lovely and darkish, and the service some of the best in the city.

First and second courses looked much more intriguing than entrees, so she decided to get the steamed mussels, pan-fried veal sweetbreads, and fries. These were all very good. The mussels came in a tomato-saffron-chorizo broth. The sweetbreads came in a raisin sauce with chestnuts. I had never had sweetbreads before, but they were tasty, I have to admit. And the fries were quite good.

I ordered the Dungeness Crab Napoleon with Spicy Black Bean Puree, Avocado and Blood Orange Reduction. It was the highlight of the evening for me: huge chunks of crab, avocado, and the intriguing blood orange sauce—sublime! I can't wait to make an excuse to have that again. That was followed with a burger on ciabatta with bleu cheese and bacon, which should have been great, but wasn't. It was cooked to order, and all the components were good, but together, it didn't gel. There was too much ciabatta, the cheese and bacon were lost in the taste of the hamburger, and I lost interest quickly.

Dessert failed to stand up to the first course either. The apple upsidedown cake was good, but its spotlight was stolen by the ginger ice cream, redolent of Ting Ting Jahe. I almost didn't order the donut holes with coffee pot de creme and vanilla froth because of the word froth—am I the only foodie who irritated by turning food into foam?? The donut holes were really disappointing, with the coffee pot de creme the best part.

It would be easy—really easy—to drop a lot of money here. Our total, with a shooter and a beer, was $59.

I was attending an event at the Oregon Convention Center, and the "restaurants" in the OCC were closed. I couldn't bare the thought of going to Burgerville or Big Town Hero, nor could I stand the thought of seeing if American Cowgirls served lunch. The OCC was kind enough to provide a restaurant list, and of the three non-chains listed, I picked Bogarts.

Bogarts is a neighborhood bar, and it appears to have been here long before Metro and the State of Oregon built their buildings. It's tiny and dingy and redolent of stale smoke and the desperation of people playing video crack. I sat myself in the small non-smoking section (what a joke), looking over the giant grill that makes up the heart of the business.

It became immediately clear that its a family business: the daughter got me a beer, her mother cooked my burger, her aunt was doing something else. Micros on tap included Black Butte Porter, Fat Tire, Widmer Hefeweizen and Drop Top Amber.

Everything on the menu ranges from $6.50-$8: 1/3# burgers, hot and cold sandwiches, salads. Sandwiches come with chips, potato salad or cottage cheese. And while my burger was nothing to write home about, it wasn't bad—and I loved the option of cottage cheese!

I really appreciated the human touch there: the staff calling me honey, watching them interact, and give directions to someone who wandered in off the street. And in the end, I liked the quiet, the feeling I wouldn't be rushed out, the chance to sit and think and embellish my notes.

Let's face facts—into every life a little fast food must fall. Even those of us who have read Fast Food Nation find the need for a quickie drivethru meal every now and again. And you really could do worse than eating at Burgerville. They're local, they tend to use good ingredients (like Oregon Country Beef and Tillamook Cheese), and they offer seasonal goodies like Walla Walla Onion Rings, Berry Shakes, and Sweet Potato fries. That said, they vary in cooking quality from store to store—but any of them are better than the other fastfood nearby

more pictures of Byways

First, let's look at breakfast, which runs til 11am on weekdays and all day on the weekends. The coffee is good, and hot. The menu looks like the usual greasy spoon fare: eggs & protein, omelettes, pancakes, hash. In fact they serve four different types of hash which look beautiful and taste even better. Griddle fare includes buttermilk pancakes, but also amaretto french toast, and super fabulous blue corn hotcakes with pecan butter. Eggs are treated respectfully and are always tasty. Potatoes are well-cooked home fries—not my fav, but hey. And, I don't know that this is the best bacon in town, but it's sure the best bacon I've had in town for quite a while.

Lunch is more of the same, stuff that sounds unassuming and unexciting until it's in front of you. They have malts, brown cows (coke with vanilla ice cream), rootbeer floats, stewarts sodas and arnold palmers (lemonade & iced tea). The lunch menu is the three Ss: soup, salads, sandwiches. The prices range from $3-$9, and the salads range from tuna salad, chef, cobb, greek, back to chicken salad. French fries accompany all the sandwiches, and they're thick on one side, thin on the other!

The counter makes great seating if you're there by yourself, and the booths, by the display case of vintage travel souvenirs are great if it's quiet or you're in a small group.

This is a small place and popular, so on the weekends, bring the paper and plan on a wait.

Cafe Castagna is one of my favorite special occasion places, and I love to invent special occasions so we can go there. The triangular room can get a bit loud, but the service is attentive and good, and the food is just reliably great.

In nice weather, you can sit outside looking at the side street and the giant flowering artichokes. Wonderful!

The menu is made up of a dozen or so starters, priced from $5-$13, including salads (their caesar is one of the best in town), and everyone's favorite aranchini (fried risotto balls that are filled with melty fontina cheese).

The cocktail list is short (though you can get most anything that isn't blended) and fun, with inventive drinks with great names. The Reine de Saba (Queen of Sheba, get it?) is made with thyme-infused vodka, and is one of the most interesting things I've tasted in months (in a good way). A tart cherry fizz is about what you'd expect, and what a good idea! There is an extensive wine list, including ten by the glass, but no beer on tap. They do have about 15 beers to choose from, however.

There are always a couple pizzas, plate-sized, crispy-crusted and quite good (not Apizza Scholls good, but good all the same), around $11. Again, inventiveness is the order of the day: when we were in, they had a flammekuechen pizza—and our resident deutschophile enjoyed it alot.

Entrees range from comfort food to comfort food, $11-$21. I had their hamburger and fries with cheddar and bacon. Everything about the hamburger and fries is just great. They have a good bun from Pearl Bakery, a good-sized but not huge hamburger patty seasoned and cooked to order, it's a good balance of bread to meat (to cheese to bacon, if you choose), accompanied with tomatoes that taste like tomatoes and homemade zucchini pickles. And then there are the great french fries. Other standards on the menu include the baked penned with cheese, which is a huge serving and one of the better mac-n-cheeses I've had in a restaurant, and the flat-iron steak with fries.

There are always new things amongst the entrees and they're also really good. The hungarian goulash was delicious, perfectly cooked, though it came with a really bland polenta (which perked right up with the goulash sauce). Lamb with white beans was a casseroley dish, with lovely lamb (and I'm not a lamb fan), and the most luscious beans. As a testament to how good that was, that plate went back to the kitchen clean—all excess bean liquor was sopped up with the Pearl baguette slices on the table.

Drawbacks: hmmm. It's loud at times, it's popular, and some of the plates (especially in the starters) are smaller than others. Your server can be very helpful with this, letting you know what is tiny and what is generous—if you ask.

All in all, this isn't a cheap dinner -- for two, it generally runs us $50 before tip, but it's one of my favorites.

Almost a year after they opened, we thought it was time to revisit Cafe Wonder, in the daylight basement of the Wonder Ballroom. I'm happy to say that while there have been some shifts in the menu, it's still good, and still reasonable.

On the bar side (and realistically, the entire place is in sight of the bar) they have 4 beers on tap (Lagunitas IPA, Pyramid Hefeweizen, Fat TIre Amber, and Miller High Life). Luckily, they also have good selection of bottled beers, wine, and cocktails, including an afterschool special for welldrinks, $2, 5-6:30 pm, which packs the place.

The menu is short and simple: the east side's cheapest steakfrites (steak and fries, $14.50), mac-n-cheese, fish-n-chips, fried chicken, veggie risotto, caesar salad, a chicken sandwich and a hamburger, with a range of prices starting at $7.

We ordered the caesar, which was tasty and huge. It's not the city's best caesar, but it's quite edible all the same. We also ordered the fried chicken. According to the menu, it's a quarter chicken, so we were a little surprised to have it come as a breast and a leg. Still, I suppose those are probably the favorite parts of chicken. The chicken was fine, but the real standout was the tiny serving of greens, which may well be the best in town. Rich with pork, complex and slightly bitter, these are what greens are supposed to be.

Servings are generous and there is none of this well-intentioned but badly executed fusion cuisine one sees in other parts of Albina. And, the fries are great.

We also had great service: a waitress who seemed to have a degree in mindreading, always at the ready to get us more alcohol or more napkins. The room is quite lovely as well. Oh, smoke-free and free wifi, too. Now, if only it was also child-free...

Think of a Parisian sidewalk cafe. It might be just like Carafe. There are drinks, and beer (I believe), but the emphasis is on wine by the carafe. This place is not cheap, but it's pretty reasonable, all things considered. The lunch menu is quite a bit cheaper than dinner, with most of the same entrees. I have yet to have something that didn't thrill me to my toes here—mussels, charcuterie, confit, salad, sandwiches, entrees, dessert—yum!

I was there most recently on a romantic lunch, so I didn't get a chance to take notes on prices (though the two of us ate to bursting, sans alcool, for $26). It's got great ambience, and good service, and lunch entree prices top out around $13 (for the bifsteak/frites), with dinner entrees are a bit more (like $20ish for the bifsteak/frites). I keep coming back for the hamburger and the steak, both with great fries. And no one will hold your bad high school French against you.

The downside here is that it's small, so if you really want to get in, make reservations. When it's full, it's noisy. And, like so many French bistros in France, the bathrooms are an adventure. Ask for the key at the hostess stand, and you'll find the washrooms in the parking structure. Hey, but if you've been in a Turkish toilet, you know you've got nothing to complain about.

See also:

• Happy Hour

My favorite mega-tapped tavern is the Concordia Ale House. However you've got to get there, it's worth it. They have 22 taps, and they have a really interesting selection of regional and international beers that you're not likely to have had on tap before. They also have the best pub grub in the city. It's nonsmoking, the wait staff know their beer and are free with the tasters.

Concordia is great, absolutely great, for us beer dorks. And, they have a weekend breakfast that's very good.

They have 20some taps—and they have nothing commonplace on those taps. You know, the stuff that's on tap consistently around town - Widmer, Full Sail, Deschutes - you won't find it at Concordia. But there is this constantly turning over selection of really interesting things. They almost always have a double IPA, a cream ale, a weizen, a couple strong beers - really interesting stuff! There have been times when there hasn't been anything on the menu that I've tried before!

Another great thing is that they give you a draft list, which gives you the name, the style, the brewery, the country. The wait staff seem really into the beer, so they can give you a good description but it's nice not to have to guess from the name. They are also very free with the tasters.

In the cooler, they have over 100 bottled beers, also described in some detail in the bottled beer menu.

Their prices are really pretty reasonable for what you're getting, and you can choose a glass, pint, imperial pint... I love that you can specifically order an imperial pint.

They also have pool tables! It's kinda noisy at times, but gosh, it's awfully good.

We went by County Cork the other night, and happened upon their happy hour (4-6pm). The menu is all about food, ranging from $2-$4.50. The HH menu includes a burger, BLT, scotch egg, banger and mash, fish-n-chips, plain ole chips, wraps, and a fish sandwich. Be forewarned, the tables are sticky—it used to be that the tables were covered by plexiglass, but now the tables and their sticky paint is exposed, and well, sticky. The food was by and large good, not exceptional, with the exception of the scotch egg which had the life cooked out of it (I guess that'll learn me about ordering a scotch egg at an Irish tavern). And a hamburger, banger & mash, scotch egg, and two pints were $17.50—pretty exceptional, really.

And if you're going for beer, particularly Irish beer, the County Cork can be pretty good. Compare Beamish, Guinness & Murphy's for example. Of their 20 taps and several cask engines, there's most always a cider, a couple lagers (Harp & Miller), and generally a broad selection of beers, some familiar, some less so.

Breakfast all day. Same day service. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, beer and bar. I'm trying to get excited about this, honest. We went in for dinner, and the best part was the fresh draught beer. We ordered a couple burgers, one with a side of chili, the other with a side salad, and an order of cheese fries. The burgers were nothing to write home about. Chili, thick and unspectacular. Side salad, almost inedible. Cheese fries were pricy, soggy, unseasoned and thoroughly underwhelming.

A lot of people love C&S for breakfast.

This restaurant is closed as of 4/29/2006

Is it disengenous to have a open a restaurant in the same location, with a very similar name to a restaurant that got great national reviews but went down in flames? I'll just leave you to mull on that while I talk about the new incarnation.

This incarnation is not related to the RIPE empire; the owners are from the Speakeasy. And full disclosure, to my incredible amazement, I know the bartender. Obviously, I go out too much.

Anyways, we went to visit during the soft opening. If you want to compare it to the GBT, you're going to be disappointed, in spite of cloth napkins, bowls of pepper and little sauciers of kosher salt. However, if you compare it with a tavern, I think you'll be pleased, or at least, not disappointed.

They have a full bar, and three beers on tap. Those were, on our visit, PBR, Mac & Jack's, and Roots IPA.

The menu is short. Burger, prime rib sandwich, polenta, soup, salad. We ordered the burger and the prime rib, with some special directions. As they were working on this stuff, I could look into the kitchen. The prime rib sandwich comes on ciabatta rolls from New Seasons; the burger is grilled and then placed atop a toasted oroweat bun.

They come with homecut fries, nicely done. The burger isn't exactly as I ordered it, but it's still juicy and delicious. The prime rib sandwich is actually two small, tall prime rib sandwiches. My sweetie, who finishes everything, brings one whole sandwich home.

These are the sort of sandwiches and fries that I am happy to eat at a tavern. Indeed, the fact that my burger is not incinerated makes me heart sing.

Our waiter is the only one on the floor, so we have great service at one point, and lousy at others. But the waiter is trying hard, jogging across the restaurant at points.

I get the impression that they're not sure what they're aiming at either. So, at hard opening at the end of the month, it'll be interesting to see what they are like.

Sometimes, you just want a comfortable place to eat a decent meal. Some comfort food with a glass of red or a good drink. Something really tasty. You could really do a lot worse than Holden's. Drinks are strong and tasty, and the menu is studded with yummy treats that will bring you back, like fish tacos, the stuffed chicken breast, pepper steak, the burger, or the crispy fried chicken. Desserts are good too. Most entrees are in the $10-$20 range, mixed drinks in the $7 range. And on a nice evening, you can sit outside, or inside with the garage door open.

An acquaintance raved about the cheeseburgers at Hope's Deli. As I sat, hungry and weak, watching a documentary on cheeseburgers yesterday, I was ripe. Hope's serves breakfast and lunch, with a small cheeseburger combo coming in under $5. They serve american and asian style food. And, boca burgers!

So, my cheeseburger was small, dressed with pickles, shredded lettuce, tomato slices and thousand island dressing. French fries were crickle-cut. No-name ketcup on the tables. All and all, nothing to write home about, but cheap, emphasis on cheap, and filling, complete with its own indoor tables.

Kelly's is just what it seems: a smokey bar with breakfast served all day. And while it seems from the outside like a dive, it's just playing. New owners have taken the truism More neon is better to heart, and it's really rather an interesting tavern. And it gets the most interesting when we're talking about beer and appetizers. One in particular, Fried Macaroni and Cheese Bites, is so wrong, and so very right. With 20 taps devoted to micros, plus PBR and a couple other macros that your dad or your cow-orker prefers, everyone can be happy.

It's hard not to really like Ken's. It's just an unassuming diner with a tiny staff, including Ken Gordon who's behind the stove most the night, but the food is simple, and at the best of times, transcendent. The starters are a great start: the caesar is garlicky and one of the best in town—but only if you like garlic. Other salads are also fine, as was the chile rellano app.

Now a friend of mine claims she's found better chicken in a restaurant, but I still believe Ken's is the best I've had outside of my own kitchen. If the buttermilk fried chicken is on the menu, you've got to have that. But it's hard to go wrong. Their burger is one of the best in town, and giant. But what really stands out for me there, as well as at Cafe Castagna, are the vegetables. I'm not much of a vegetable eater, but I am always certain to order them there -- they are always excellently prepared. Oh. And the pecan pie is to die for.

• Ken's Place
  An Exploration of Portland Food and Drink
  

Tuesday is the grand opening of K&Z. I've been a couple times during the soft opening, and while they've been working the kinks out, the food has been right on target.

I've got more photos online if you care to look.

For a brewpub, the food is some of the best in town. Which is to say it's uneven, but still; there's a reason this place is full at meal times. There's a good-sized, and diverse, menu of salads, sandwiches, and full entrees. And they have killer fries. Also, a great weekend breakfast.

But my beef with the Laurelwood is that it's wildly popular too. At least, most of the times when I've been there, it's so loud that I couldn't hear anything my companion said. But, if you don't like kids, really lots of really little kids running about willy-nilly, just as if they've been drinking beer and own the place, don't bother.

Dude, I just got the best festivus present ever! The New Old Lompoc project on N Failing, aka Failing Williams, aka 5Q, is open! They have all the Old Lompoc Brewery beers on tap, natch, including an insane five (5!) winter seasonals, as well as hard liquor. Two nitro thingees. They have this sophisticated space, not as self-consciously cool as Pix next door, but lovely in an astere, calm sort of way. They have—wait for it!—a garage door (thankfully not open this time of year). They have these crazy huge long booths which practically demand interaction, and appear to be built for beer lovers. And real adult food. The macaroni & cheese of the day yesterday was a rib-eye in a red wine-cream sauce over penne—a lovely stroganoff of sorts. The steak was delicious and a steal at $14, presented over the rich, creamy and thoroughly homemade mashed potatoes, and perfectly done veggies. Meatloaf, well damn, I loved that, too. They have a healthy list of appetizers, salads and sandwiches too, and the fries look great. No wi-fi yet. They'll start brewing in the spring, and distilling in the summer. Damn!

Regular house pints are $3.50. There's a happy hour, too.

Other Press:

• Like a breath of fresh air, the Fifth Quadrant beckons
  Liz Colie Gadberry, the Portland Tribune

I can't speak to the Lotus as a bar (it has a handful of unexciting beers on tap), but I can speak to the Lotus as a lunch spot. The Lotus isn't great, but it's plenty good enough. The food is good, fast, reasonable, and the service, as long as you aren't a jerk, is good. I wouldn't go out of my way for it, but for me, it makes a great lunch joint when it's too icky to get cart food, and I just want to be able to sit and read and have food appear almost instantly.

Mash Tun is just a little brewpub, just a little off Alberta, behind Office. It has a nice little bar, a small room, and a nice covered patio which easily doubles the space. In addition to brewing a few house beers, they have a nice, concise selection of craft beers and imports, and they offer food: not the best food, but the sort of stuff that can prolong your drinking.

Now, brewpubs or taverns that offer undistinguished, inconsistent food isn't that unusual, of course—it sadly seems to be the law (with exceptions like Widmer). But how many of them offer vegan options next to their more meaty third-cousins? I can think of only a handful of places, but Mash Tun is one.

On tap, they have 2 house beers, 3 imports, and 7 craft beers. They also have a handful of things in bottles and cans (brother, clap your hands). None of this is terribly cheap: for imperial pints, the house ales are $4, craft beers are $4.25, and imports are $4.50, with non-tap options ranging from $2.25-$4.50.

I haven't been so crazy about their house beers, but they are very drinkable. The tap selections rotate, so there is always something good on. Last night, for example, there were 4 or 5 different craft beers that I would be very happy to drink. Nice!

In recent times, the place has changed up a little bit. You can still smoke at the bar, or outside, but you have to vacate outside by 10. The jukebox is still there. But the pool table has been replaced by table-tables. I don't know about the wi-fi, but I hope it's still there. We got there shortly before 6, and the place was pretty full.

The new food menu is about a month old, and made up of appetizers, a small collections of soups and salads, and pub grub (which means sandwiches). No more of their wildly erratic fish and chips. Appetizers range from $2.75-$7, with all of the usual deep fried subjects. Tots and fries can come cheesy if you like. There's also vegan red lentil puree & tempeh things, and nachos.

They offer house, caesar, spinach, and a roasted beet salad, a soup de jour, and a chili con carne, $2.95-$7. And for sandwiches ($7.50-$10), they have a burger, and a variety of other things that are served on rolls. Vegan options include a vegan burger & a BLATO (fakin-lettuce-avocado-tomato-onion with veganaise), and there's falafel and roasted eggplant for veggies.

We tried to order cheesy tots, but alas, no tots this evening. So we ordered a cheesesteak and a meatball sandwich, both with their hand-cut skinny fries. And both sandwiches were very edible. The cheesesteak had a nice balance of cheese to meat to cooked yellow onion, and came with a side of good, but not great marinara. The meatball sandwich was dosed in both marinara and melted cheese, but the meatballs were plentiful, tender and tasty. Unfortunately, neither of the rolls the sandwiches came on had been toasted, and the fries are soggy and greasy. Why do some taverns insist on hand-cut fries?

So. Nice patio, nice ever-changing selection of beers, and deep-fried appetizers rock... unless they're fries.

This bar can be quite cosy. Ten taps, three with a beer engine, and the largest selection of spirits in the state of Oregon. Just recently had the worst lunch in recent memory there, with abysmal service to boot. They have a new chef, and supposably will have another one in a month.

It's all about the lunch, and burgers, and cash. You have limited choices: essentially burgers and fries, and a couple other things that are afterthoughts. You can get a cheeseburger, or a double cheeseburger. You can get it with bacon. Don't get uppity though -- there's one kind of cheese. The burger comes on a pillowy bun with krinkle cut fries.

There is something so delightful about this place. It's not cheap (a bacon cheeseburger is $7.50), and as they only take cash, not always so easy, and the food is not by any stretch of the imagination gourmet. Maybe it's the sea of maroon vinyl, or the strange enclosed garden out the window, maybe it's the homemade shakes, or maybe it's the fact that it's so insanely fast. I timed it today—6 minutes between ordering, and having a cheeseburger of my own. Anyways, it's great in an anti-bistro burger sort of way.

Okay, so I didn't eat in the dining room. I had a catered lunch at a meeting.

When I think of catered meals, even from nice places, I think of premade sandwiches wrapped in saranwrap and steamtable fare. My expectations are lowered. I'm happy if anything tastes at all like the original foodstuff.

But I was much impressed with the Red Star. I'm writing this from the standpoint of if I had eaten in the dining room: those were my expectations. And they were met, ably.

Much to my surprise, we were offered a smaller version of the lunch menu. Appetizers range from $6-13, and we tried a clam chowder, crab-salmon cakes, a beet soup, grilled asparagus salad, a caesar, and a roasted beet salad. The presentation was gorgeous, and everything I tried was excellent and nuanced.

For the entree, there were a range of choices: salmon, cheeseburger, fish and chips, quesadilla, chicken breast sandwich, prime rib french dip, new york steak, and mac-n-cheese ($10.50-$24)—we tried all but the first two. Again, beautiful. The mac-n-cheese was as good as a homemade version, with a nice crust. The steaks were thick and grilled to order, and so flavorful. Everyone else raved about their food, and everything looked so good, enough to make you think, maybe I should have ordered that.

We also had dessert—also lovely and tasty.

My lunch, if I had paid for it, would have been $30. Was it worth it? Yeah, I think so. The atmosphere of the place is definitely business lunch, but the food was good. And was beautiful. I don't know that I'd be going there every month, but once every year or so? Why not?

A friend refers to the food here as unedible. Go for the beer, and remember that they have to serve food to serve alcohol.

We heard really good things about a Kobe beef burger served at both the Newport and Portland brewpubs, and so we went. Everything went wrong. The dining room was closed for a private party, which is usually the non-smoking space (so, there was no non-smoking space). The beer wasn't as good as other times. And, we went to order our Kobe beef burger ($10 without cheese, $12 with blue) and learned that you can only get blue cheese on the burger. Mind you, their normal burgers offer cheddar, swiss or blue, but order Kobe and you have any cheese as long as it's blue. (that has changed, btw)

So, we got the burgers. They came, perfectly round and flat, as if they had been frozen. They were cooked to order, and on an okay bun. Me, as a fan of blue cheese burgers, loved mine. My sweetheart, who had been denied his cheese of choice, was less happy.

Fries were good. Serving was hearty. But we both like Cafe Castagna's burger better, with its choice of cheese and incredible fries.

I was drawn to Rose & Thistle by the patio. They have a lovely patio out back, just round patio tables with umbrellas and plastic chairs. There's lots of greenery around though—it's quite pleasant.

As Portland's only Scots pub, Rose & Thistle is quite a bit like you might except, and you would be right. There's draft beer, single malt scotch, darts, and scottish food, most frighteningly the Authentic Scots Egg (hard boiled egg wrapped in pork sausage, then deep-fried). You can hear your arteries slamming shut when you bite into one of those babies, but they are yummy.

Know this: when the Scottish gentlemen come into RaT, they don't order food.

They serve their draft beer in 20 oz imperial pints. Last night they had:
-Guinness
-Boddingtons
-Stella Artois
-Blackthorn Cider
-Mirror Pond IPA
-Amnesia Porter
-Widmer Hefeweizen
-Drop top Amber
-Lagunitas IPA
-PBR
-Miller Lite
and they have two rotators, which last night were
-New Belgium Skinny Dip
-Widmer Broken Halo IPA

Service is quite friendly but can be glacial. In addition to the scotch egg, they also have sausage rolls and haggis on the starter menu. The sausage rolls aren't the best in town, but they are a decent snack. Most mealy things are in the $8-$13 range, but I've had nothing worth writing home about.

People speak fondly of the burger here, and it is beautiful. However, if you like it cooked to order, don't bother ordering it here.

The HVAC system keeps the smoke away from the non smokers fairly well. There is also a video crack closet.

And really, that's a good thing. It makes that meal a special event, which is nice given that I, and perhaps you, eat out entirely too much.

So. Simpatica. I've only been for brunch, but it's one of those things that stands out. Not only is it the best breakfast you've had all week, it might be the best meal period.

First of all, all the meats come from Viande, which conveniently enough is their meat shop. Yum.

Every week, the menu changes. Prices range from $8-$10. Some things stay, like belgian waffles, chicken and waffles, and biscuits and gravy. So, with something like chicken and waffles, where the fried chicken is the best in town, and the waffles come with a fruit or berry based syrup (or regular maple syrup if you'd prefer), it's easy to get into a rut, and order it every week. A wonderful, magical rut!

But you are rewarded for trying the new stuff too. There's always a frittata, a hash, and crepes. There's always the breakfast sandwich, the cheeseburger, and the philly cheese steak.

I've had the cheese steak: best in town. The cheeseburger may well be the best too—if only it came with french fries. And, I've tried everything else that was close enough for me to stab, and everything, everything has been superb. Every meal there has been memorable and delicious.

They serve Stumptown Coffee, bloody marys, mimosas, wine, beer and cocktails, to ease your way into the morning.

So what's the drawback, other than it just happening on Sundays? Well, Bon Appetit named Simpatica one of the Top 10 hot new restaurants in the US for 2006 (June 2006), and so the lines waiting for breakfast have just increased. Now everyone knows about it. Gee, thanks!

The room is loud, and in the best of circumstances, you have your choice of a 4-top or a communal table. That said, you may meet some new folks.

Slow Bar is a sophisticated small room, with some tall womblike booths, a comfie seating area, a couple tables, and of course, a lovely long bar which dominates the room. It can be smoky, but early on in the evening, it's not too bad for those of us who have given up the cancer sticks.

Originally, the focus at Slow Bar was hard alcohol, and I think it's fair to say that it's still important, but us beer drinkers have been recognized as well. Taps now include:

• Widmer
• Droptop Amber
• Deschutes Buzzsaw Brown
• Deschutes Mirror Pond Pale Ale
• Deschutes Inversion IPA
• Lagunitas Censored
• PBR
• Murphy's Irish Stout
• Pilsner Urquel
• Stella Artois
• Widmer Hefeweizen

In honor of the bar's heritage, I got a strawberry margarita, made with house infused tequila. Yum. The drink menu had prices from $5-$7.50.

The food menu is short, irreverent, and fairly inventive. I have to love a place that offers fries with "melted stinky cheese". They have appetizers ($3.50-$7), and other stuff like ceviche, pizzetta, pasta, and sandwiches ($5-9.50). A handful of the options are vegetarian, and another couple involve fish.

But the best part, really, is happy hour. 3-6pm. $2.50 off well drinks, $1 off beer.

Happy hour also has a short food menu, with prices ranging from $2.50-$5.50. That includes olives, spicy mixed nuts, hand cut fries (with or without stinky cheese), green salad, ceviche, asparagus tempura, southern fry, and 3 pizzettas.

We ordered a couple of southern fries (hushpuppies, buttermilk fried chicken, a spicy honey butter, and a dijon dipping sauce), a ceviche, and a plate of fries.

The southern fry ($7.50, or $5.50 happy hour) is not a huge plate, but there's enough artery-clogging food here to at least slow you down. The chicken is all white meat, and in tenders-like chunks, then batter-dipped and deep fried, and honestly, I felt like I was eating fancy chicken fingers. Which isn't a bad thing. The hushpuppies were a little leaden, but they were nicely made inhalable with the spicy honey butter.

The ceviche ($7.50, or $5 happy hour) was a success as well—nothing that would compare, say, with D.F. or Taqueria Neuve or Andina or Autentica, but tasty and generous. And the hand-cut fries ($4.50, or $2.50 happy hour) are just that. They're obviously hand-cut into small planks and single-fried, so they aren't crisp, but in spite that, they're really tasty.

And because everything on the happy hour menu seemed so cheap, we just kept ordering, and that is how we came to spend $35 on a happy hour meal. We had a great experience, however, and we'll be back.

The one weird thing is the music situation. They have a great punk rock jukebox, and they'd be playing something cool off it, and then suddenly some other "music" would cut in. WTF?

Other Press:
• Bar Fly
• Isaac Laquedem
• Portland Picks
• Willamette Week

But I've been motivated to get over there lately, now that I am completely infatuated with grits, and I know Tin Shed's got 'em. Unfortunately, I was a little undercaffeinated, so I didn't take a lot of notes.

The inside is a nice, but small and crowded space. The outside, under a giant roof, and backed by a giant fireplace, is almost twice the size of the interior, and really pleasant on a nice day. That patio is a great place to dogwatch, as many folks bring theirs with them. Inside or out, you serve yourself coffee and water.

They have a big new breakfast menu that debuted 4/29/2006. We ordered Huevos Ranchitos, Roll Over, and two sides of cheese grits.

Now, we habitually order the You Gotta Have it, which is eggs any style, meat, toast or homemade biscuit, and potato pancakes or grits. I love potato pancakes (really, I just love carbs), so that's what I always end up ordering. It's good, solid, great biscuits—what's not to love?

Huevos Ranchitos is just like the ranchero version, except there is no ranchero sauce, there are 2 layers of tortilla, as well as jalapeno-stewed black beans and rice, scrambled eggs, homemade salsa, sour cream, and green onion (they own stock in green onion). It was tasty but it would have been better if everything if the things that should be hot: like beans, rice, and eggs, actually were. The rice was all clumped as if it had come out of the cardboard carton in your fridge. The beans were not spicy at all, but they did have a nice cumin flavor.

The Roll Over starts with a layer of potato pancakes, then a layer of scrambled eggs & sausage, then a layer of bacon gravy. I expected this to be a conflict of interest, what with the sausage and bacon, but it tasted great. However, nothing on my plate was consistently hot either. The gravy was the warmest element, but it had hot and cold spots (ooogh).

The grits were most disappointing. They're plain grits with grated cheese added almost as an afterthought, and the grits were so not hot that the cheese wasn't melting. Butter, also not melting. I finally sent them back to be nuked.

To their credit, we complained, and they comped us for one meal. We saw some other plates going back to the kitchen, so maybe someone was having a bad bad day?

Unfortunately, we had a really lackluster dinner there recently as well.

Other reviews

• Portland Blog