I didn't come up with this definition, but when you hear family restaurant, you need to abandon hope that the food will be anything better than edible.

When I first moved to Portland, my ex used to drag me to Poor Richard's in Hollywood. We'd sit in the bar, order a stiff drink and a steak, and each time I'd realize that I had blocked out the previous visits and how awful it was.

Similarly, recently, I was thinking that it wasn't all that bad. Sadly, I was wrong.

Poor Richard's has a dining room and a lounge. The dining room is shabbily colonial, with tables here and there of large family gatherings and elderly folks. We didn't visit the lounge, but I'm sure it was probably a little less comatose.

The claim-to-fame for Poor Richard's is their two-fers: order two of the same thing for one low price! You have a choice of tenderloin ($21.95-$32.95), top sirloin ($20.45-$27.45), cod fish & chips ($21.95), pork loin ($19.95), and three different styles of chicken ($19.95). Admittedly, you save a buck or two off the menu price, but realistically, these aren't incredibly cheap prices. Even the single menu prices aren't cheap.

We ordered a couple beers (the hefeweizen was fine, but less popular beers weren't quite right), an appetizer of Teriyaki Grilled Chicken Strips ($5.95), and the 8oz top sirloin. The chicken strips were speedy and quite tasty.

Dinners include your choice of

cole slaw, tossed salad or soup of the day, garlic bread, choice of baked potato (after 4:00pm), seasoned french fries or rice pilaf, coffee and tea and soft vanilla ice cream. All dinner items are cooked to order.

We were quite hungry and our waitron quite accommodating—we consumed multiple small baskets of garlic bread. The cole slaw arrived, a perfectly round scoop with a big round slice of pickled beet laid against it. The cabbage was cut into tiny tiny pieces and the dressing was too sweet.

Not long afterwards came our steaks. I ordered a loaded baked potato and they took me at my word—it was the highlight of the meal for me. The steaks—eh? Tough, gristly, overcooked. Admittedly, when a steak costs $15, I'm not expecting much, but there are plenty of great steaks at the $20 mark, and good steaks at $15. Just not here.

I'm usually a good eater, but the potato was all I could finish.

With tip, it was over $50, which is straying into special-occasion territory. And while the people watching is excellent, I can't recommend this for a special occasion.

• BarFly